I must be insane

I'm absolutely positive that I have heard from a number of different sources, credible ones, that mothers should place some of the housekeeping burden on their childrens' capable shoulders. The children should be able to keep their rooms clean, and help with other things around the house. I want to know how many of those credible sources have tried to get children to clean. All I have to say to that is "WHATEVER!" Other than unloading the dishwasher - which for some reason the boys do without too much pressure from me, if I want something done, I pretty much have to do it myself. If I'd like to involve my children, I do it with the understanding that it is at my own peril. The peril is mainly due to massive pressure which builds up inside my cranial cavity when I have to repeat myself inexcess of 100 times. Usually it is something like this, "You need to clean your room. . .get off of the computer, and get to work. . .no more games today, your grounded, get down there and clean it up, quit fighting, I don't care if he isn't doing anything you can't pound on him you have to come and talk to me about it I'm serious stop the yelling and sobbing and get to work you will not leave this house all weekend if you can't get this done. . .do it now!" And that is how a chore which should take 2 boys less than a half an hour becomes a half day affair involving the entire family. And what if there is more than one room to be staightened? Oh heaven bless us, what a pipe dream.

I asked the boys this morning why they thought their parents' room stayed pretty clean. Their response was "you don't have any toys." These are boys of eleven and nearly-nine. "You don't have any toys." I wish that were the answer. It would mean that I could just remove all toys from their rooms and be done with it. The problem is, they don't pick up. . .anything. The concept of cleaning is more than completely foreign to them. They have a clothes hamper - but all their dirty clothing ends up on the floor. (Even when the hamper is actually right next to them when they are taking off said clothing!) They have drawers, but their clean clothing ends up in a pile on their bed. When they are supposed to be cleaning, what they usually do is play with their legos - and since they never pick up anything - there are usually legos everywhere as well. I told them last night that I'm not coming down to tuck them in unless their room is clean. I'm sick and tired of crawling over clothes, legos, books and open drawers to pull the covers up over them and give them a kiss. There is much more at stake here than simply having a clean room. Their nightime comfort is also on the block. What T is freaking out over the most, however, is the fact that he won't be able to play with his friend this afternoon if he doesn't get something done. It's finally quiet down there, which means that they are probably playing with their legos.

Sadly for me, we have Q's birthday party in the morning, and that means that I've got to get the house under control, today. Interestingly, there really isn't THAT much to do! I had these images of everyone running to get their work done, and all the things I would be able to accomplish by noon. Well, I've cleaned a bathroom. Two other rooms in the house have suffered play-damage while I was working - which is the reason I refer to this whole scenario as a pipe dream. My bed is the only one made and I've still got all the laundry to fold, still. There is the pile of mail on the counter which I generally go through on friday. E and Q's room needs work. The living room carpet needs some spot cleaning - circles from a tire iron that Q brought in, and some barf from little A. I've got this tight feeling in my chest, and I feel a headache coming on. (Breathe, yes, got to remember to breathe.) I'm sure I'll be able to get it all done. I just didn't want to spend the entire day on it. That is exactly the kind of thought that makes me wonder from time to time about my own sanity. Clean an entire house with the children IN IT? I must be insane.