Toffee

A few years ago, my friend gave us a plate of Christmas goodies. Okay, now you're thinking - So? What's new? Well, it changed our lives, that's what. She introduced us to homemade toffee. Until then, Heath bars were as close as I had ever been to toffee, and that was in the third grade. I never actually ate any, we were just supposed to sell it for a school fund raiser. Since I couldn't figure out how to SAY it, I found it a hard sell. No one really wanted to purchase "Health bars" from the neighbor kid. But I digress.

Real homemade toffee, ever had any? I promise if you have good toffee, and then you find out how easy it is to make, it is an instant family favorite. Such a pleasure to give to neighbors, because you know they'll love it. I swear it only takes like ten minutes. Okay, it used to take ten minutes. This year, I haven't been able to get a single batch to turn out right. My family is complaining about my butter choice - probably because they heard me mutter in confusion - "I wonder if it's the butter?" Really. What could be so different between two different store brand butters? Honestly, even the imperfect batches taste good - it's just a consistency issue. Too cruchy. Too chewy. Not sticking together at all. It all tastes good. I'm not giving up though. Too much is riding on a good batch. My reputation and a tasty family Christmas tradition is on the line. My eleven year old son holds me nigh unto the angels for the simple fact that I can whip up his favorite treat at any time. When asked what he wanted for his birthday - he said MY OWN BATCH OF TOFFEE. His birthday was two weeks ago.

So you're beginning to see my predicament. There can be no going back. There can be no giving in. The riddle must be solved. I must find the magic key. Maybe I need to stir it less. I suppose it could be the butter. And so we go forward, unflinching in the face of complete failure. There must be toffee for Christmas, or it will be. . .like Christmas before we knew that it only takes like ten minutes to make good homemade toffee. Or something similar.