Never Dreamed.

I am at such a crazy place. When I was 15, on the Olympic High School Swim Team, no one could have convinced me that I'd be here. I enjoyed swimming. It rounded me out. It gave me something to reach for, besides grades. I was probably the worst swimmer on the team - or at least VERY close to the worst, vying for worst. (snicker) But it was about personal improvement and doing my best. It didn't bother me that it wasn't anywhere near the best. I had no idea how important it would be to my sanity at this point in my life. Three years on a swim team has made a world of difference to today's version of me.

I started swimming again last month, and have been three times. I've tried to get into a routine before, but the struggle of getting the kids to a sitter made the hour into a half day event. It wasn't worth that much time to me. I didn't have support from my husband, which was frustrating. I gave up. Now, however, I am without my children every other weekend. It can be lonely, and I make sure to plan things that I couldn't do if they were here. I don't squander that time because there just isn't that much of it. The first time I swam, I did 300 yards in 20 minutes. Today, I was able to do 900 yards in 35 minutes. I still feel a little bit jello-y in the muscles. It's great. As I'm swimming I can hear my coach yelling in my head. I know when my stroke is getting weak, I know when I'm shutting down 5 yards from the wall. I know when I'm not kicking because someone is yelling at me to kick harder. Today, as I came into the last wall, I heard a familiar voice say, "power it into the wall." My muscles were tired, but determination rose in me, and I did it. It felt wonderful. I knew I had done good work. 

You can't even dream some of what is out there, waiting. You can't imagine how important the ways you develop and grow will be to a future you. Pour yourself into. . . well, yourself. Care about yourself. Be grateful for your blessings. Tell the Lord, "THANK YOU!" Believe me, every time I get into the water, and feel myself moving in old familiar ways, I AM SO GRATEFUL that they ARE old and familiar. It is like coming home to the 15 year old me. I feel younger and more hopeful - a lot more like her. What a blessing!